SEX WITH AN ALIEN cont'd

Photo: Front cover of Maximillien de Lafayette's new book "Zeta Reticuli and Anunnaki Descendants Among Us. Who Are They?" includes the full story of Pamela Stonebrooke. This mind-boggling book is published by Amazon.com Company and Times Square Press. Available my mid February 2008.

In the Sun, Louise Compton wrote: “Few people can claim to have experienced? out of this world’ sex - but Pamela Stonebrooke is a woman who can. The 52-year-old jazz singer says she enjoyed mind-blowing alien romps with a six-foot reptilian for three years. Her story is among a number featured in World's Strangest UFO Stories which premieres this Sunday on the Discovery Channel. Speaking exclusively to The Sun Online, Pamela revealed: My first sexual encounter with an alien was unlike any love-making I’ve experienced before. “It was so intense and enjoyable and, without wanting to get too graphic, he was so much larger than most men. I remember exactly how I felt when I saw him for the first time. I awoke from my sleep to find myself making love to what appeared to be a Greek god. At first I assumed it was an exceptionally lucid dream. But the sex was very intense and as I closed my eyes I was overwhelmed by how comfortable I felt with this unknown being. The next time I opened my eyes he had transformed into a reptilian entity with scaley, snake-like skin. It was then I realized I was making love to a shape-shifting alien. Sensing I was scared, the reptile whispered: “We’ve always been together, we love each other.’ The orgasms were intense. When I tell men about my reptilian experience, they find it difficult.”

Stonebrooke: “I 'romped' with 6ft alien”

Photo: Stonebrooke on the cover of her album.

Let’s start with the very beginning of this fascinating story with what the UFO International Congress stated about Pamela Stonebrook: “Pamela Stonebrooke is a recording artist, singer and songwriter from Los Angeles, who had no interest in UFOs or aliens until she was forced to confront the phenomena when she awoke inside a spacecraft surrounded by Greys. For the next year and a half, she went through a dark night of the soul as she dealt with the trauma of emerging memories of other abductions, as well as the alienation from friends and family who could not accept her experiences. She finally went public 2 years ago, and is currently writing a book about her life and her encounters entitled “Experiencer”. Pamela talks about her encounters with her four Grey hybrid daughters, and openly discusses her intimate interactions with the renegade ‘bad boys of alienology”, the Reptilians. From terror and denial to awakening and expansion, she proposes a metaphysical perspective of the abduction phenomenon. She also discusses the interdimensional and transformational aspects of her experiences and shares some tools for making the encounters more than manageable.”

Pamela Stonebrooke: “Let me just say that one of the most frustrating things about coming forward with this information is the constant third-hand misinterpretation from a misquoted, misrepresented article...picked up and rehashed and sensationalized for yet another article...ad nauseam. Add to that, the judgmental belief systems that this misquoted information is filtered through...and then paraphrased...and added to...and then further distorted and again disseminated. I could spend every waking moment attempting to clarify something for which most people have no frame of reference.”

Photo: Jazz singer Pamela Stonebrooke on the cover of her CD.

Pamela Stonebrooke, a professional jazz singer residing in Los Angeles, California, says she will tell her own incredible story of alien encounter in a forthcoming book to be published by Ballantine Books, a division of Random House. According to a June 3, 1998 report in the New York Post newspaper, Ballantine outbid at least two other major publishers for Stonebrooke's story. The Post left little doubt about why the book attracted so much attention. Stonebrooke's own book proposal says she engaged in sex with a "reptilian" alien. "She recounts this act of interspecies intercourse in a graphic, no-holds-barred, tour de force description, unique in UFO literature, replete with precise physical and emotional detail, sensational without being sensationalistic," the Post said, quoting from the book proposal. But Stonebrooke told CNI News that the Post article "seriously misrepresented the true nature" of her ET encounters. The real point of her story, she says, is not the lurid sex, but that she succeeded in not becoming a "victim" in a potentially overpowering situation. "The book will tell about my reptilian encounters, a subject that very few women are prepared to speak openly about," Stonebrooke wrote in a June 8, 1998 "open letter" to UFO researchers. But, she said, "I'll be examining and exploring my contact experiences in light of their transformative aspects, recognizing that the phenomenon is, and can be, an incredible catalyst for expanded self-awareness. Reptilians are not a politically correct species in the UFO community, and to admit to having sex with one -- much less enjoying it -- is beyond the pale as far as the more conservative members of that community are concerned... But I know I am not unique in reporting this kind of experience," Stonebrooke wrote in her open letter.

 

Photo: The Alien lover of Pamela Stonebrooke: Drawing by Kesara as described by Pamela Stonebrooke.

CNI News editor Michael Lindemann interviewed Pamela Stonebrooke on June 21, 1998.

Stonebrooke says she has been a professional singer since she put her first band together at the age of 14. She's played jazz clubs in Europe, England and Japan, and now works mostly in her home town of Los Angeles. She's played with the best musicians in the business, she says, and she writes most of her own music. Like many people who claim to have what Temple University professor David Jacobs terms a "secret life" as an alien abductee, Pamela Stonebrooke seems to be a successful, self-confident, rational person. She's smart, articulate, and often funny. Apparently she did not need the notoriety of a tell-all book to earn her 15 minutes of fame. "To even come forward with this has really put me in a tenuous spot," she says. "I'm actually reluctant to be famous.... I have a deep reverence for my artistry and my life, in terms of it being peaceful. I now wonder if I've shattered that possibility." Her strange experiences didn't seem "alien" at first, she says. Years ago, she took an interest in so-called out-of-body experiences and paranormal phenomena.

Pamela Stonebrooke: I've been digging into the paranormal for quite some time. I astral projected about thirteen or fourteen years ago. I had an out of the body experience. I had no idea what was happening.

Michael Lindemann: You weren't trying to do it?

PS: No. But it was such an incredible experience that I wanted to find out what it was and see if I could do it again. So I really set out to become a skilled astral projector. I read every book I could find.... I went to other planets. I went to places that scared the living daylights out of me, but I thought it was all in my imagination. I was fine when I came back. So I was really having a ball.

ML: Do you continue to do this today?

PS: Absolutely. It's one of my greatest adventures.

ML: How does this relate to the ET encounters you say you've had?

PS: When I had this [alien encounter] experience, it had the flavor of an out of body experience. The thing that freaked me out about my first encounter was that I awoke aboard what I think is a spacecraft -- I was in a metallic room, oddly shaped...

ML: When was this?

PS: This was five years ago.

ML: Was this again an unexpected, spontaneous event?

PS: Yes, it was.

Stonebrooke says she awoke to find herself surrounded by strange "gray" beings with huge black eyes, the kind of alien that is most often reported by abductees. She says she had no idea who these beings were, because up to this time she had never paid any attention to UFO lore.

PS: I had not paid much attention to this whole thing. I was into metaphysics and channeling and opening my chakras. I had never read any accounts, never been to a UFO conference. I wasn't really interested in that stuff.

ML: How did you feel when you first saw these beings?

PS: I was panicked. They were filing into the room and standing around me, and I was literally shaking in a corner. I was in a fetal position, going "No, no, where am I? What is going on?" And this being that I perceived as a female came over to me, put her hand on my shoulder and said, "Don't be afraid. All you have to do is be here. Come with me." She took me into a room. It's still very vivid to me. On this metallic table that was a couple of feet from the floor were these four little girls, ages about 8, 9, 10 and 11 -- something like that -- and they came running over to me, calling me "Mommy." I was literally paralyzed against the wall. They were grabbing the bottom of my arms. I was trying to pull my arms away, and they were grabbing me.

ML: How did you react to these little girls calling you "Mommy"?

PS: I was panicked, because I had never wanted to be a mother. I had always made sure that I had never been pregnant. However, putting pieces together now, I remember years ago having four false pregnancies which I couldn't explain at the time. I didn't worry about them then, because I hadn't been with anyone.

ML: You're saying that you can recall, in the "normal" part of your life years ago, that you had four unexplained false pregnancies?

PS: Yes. At the time, I was really busy, partying a lot and living the lifestyle of a musician. So I had excuses for why I was hemorrhaging, or why I had weird symptoms or morning sickness. I had other reasons. I was heavily into the music scene, so I made excuses for all that stuff and really didn't worry about it.

ML: Did the four little girls look like normal human children?

PS: They didn't look human, but human-like. They really looked like a mixture. I was afraid of them because, first of all, I couldn't imagine me being a mother, and secondly, I couldn't imagine being the mother of something I didn't fully recognize as human. In retrospect, I've dealt with the guilt I felt for not being able to embrace them and accept them.

ML: When you woke up the next morning, was all of this clear in your memory?

PS: Yes, vivid. And I knew that something about it was different than an astral projection. Because, literally, I have astral projected to places where there were half-animal, half-human beings tearing at me, and have awakened in the morning and said, "Oh man, I'm glad that was only a projection." So now we have little girls grabbing my arm, and I'm totally panic-stricken. It doesn't make sense.

ML: Was there something in particular the next day that convinced you that this had been more physically real than an out-of-body experience?

PS: Yes. I had my kimono on, and I noticed that my arms were sore at the bottom. So I pulled my kimono sleeve up, and I saw little bruise marks on my arm, from my elbow down to my wrist. The minute I saw them, it was a confirmation to me that something really physical had happened.

ML: How did you feel about that?

PS: For the next year and a half, I was pretty much a mess. I was trying to share with friends, and with my minister at Science of Mind church. And I was really unhappy at not being taken seriously -- in fact, looked at like I was crazy. My friends stopped calling me because I wasn't fun any more. All I wanted to talk about was this...

Feeling increasingly frustrated and anxious, Stonebrooke says, she went to a well-known local channeler named Darryl Anka, seeking advice. Anka gave her a recently published book by a woman named Kim Calrsberg, called "Beyond My Wildest Dreams." In the book, Carlsberg describes her own struggle to come to terms with alien abduction.

PS: Darryl gave me Kim Carlsberg's book, and I think I must have sobbed all the way through it. It was somehow healing. It helped me start processing stuff. I still have a real hard time talking about some of the medical procedures that I remember from incidents after that. In fact, that's the only thing that I can't really talk about without having the trauma come back in my face.

ML: Do you mean to say that you've recalled other abductions where you experienced medical procedures?

PS: Yes, I started to remember other encounters, and they were very disturbing to me. Most of the stuff that scared me was the medical stuff, because of the coldness and the detachment that I felt from the beings, not to mention the physical symptoms.

ML: Judging from hints you've previously given about your forthcoming book, you seem to feel very differently about your encounters with so-called "reptilian" aliens. You've even suggested that you enjoyed your sexual encounters with these beings.

PS: I've said that the connection we had, and the sex, was better than anything I had experienced. But it wasn't so much the physical act of sex as the whole experience of ecstatic mental, spiritual, emotional and physical -- a combination of experience -- that made it so amazing to me.

ML: When did you first have an encounter with a being you call a reptilian? How did that come about?

PS: I was really getting through my "gray stuff" pretty well. I had managed to finally apply my metaphysics, one of the fundamentals of which is that our spirit -- the part of us that is a spark of the infinite -- signs us up for some lessons to be learned in this life. We basically pick our script, make our contract, come here, do it the best we can, and if we're lucky, wake up to the fact that we can actually author this experience with our thoughts, beliefs and awareness. So I was able to apply my metaphysics and say, "If I signed up for everything else in my life, then I definitely signed up for this too. Now, what can these experiences teach me?" Well, the first and most obvious thing is that it can make me face any fear. If I can get through the fear of something that I don't even have the vocabulary to explain, then there won't be much in this physical dimension that frightens me. So I said, if I signed up for this, I must be ready for it. And then I said, OK, I want to know more. What's really going on here? In my meditations, I said, Take me further... So, basically, the reptilian showed up. The first time, it shape-shifted from a gorgeous blond man to a reptilian being...

ML: When was this?

PS: That was about a year and a half after my gray stuff, when I really started to process it and feel comfortable. I was ready for anything.

ML: How is it that you wound up in bed with this gorgeous man? Was that intentional on your part, or a surprise?

PS: I woke up in my bed and he was making love to me. I was pretty sure that I was totally awake, that it wasn't a dream. And I said to myself, I don't know this person. I didn't bring him home last night. But I also felt like there was a mental connection. It didn't feel like a lucid dream, it didn't feel like out of the body. I didn't know what it was, but I felt pretty safe. And I was getting a telepathic communication: "You're safe with me. We have been together before."

ML: Then what happened?

PS: Basically, the entity shape-shifted into a reptilian being.

ML: When you say reptilian being, why do you say that? What features make this being reptilian to you?

PS: That's [how] I've come to identify it. It's humanoid, very sentient. I could tell there was an incredible intelligence and mental communication with this being. I felt in a lot of ways that I was looking at a part of myself once again, an aspect of myself, something very familiar to me. It did have almost like a snake's body -- if you rub it the way the scales flow -- firm but smooth. That's what it felt like to me.

ML: What kind of eyes did it have?

PS: The eyes were a bit larger than ours, and I was catching glimpses of colors: gold, speckles of red, and brown, with a vertical pupil.

ML: Vertical like a cat's eye?

PS: Yes. And very handsome, oddly enough. Maybe because, again, of the mental communication. I was shocked and frightened because of the appearance at first, and then I decided to participate.

ML: Are you saying that your lovemaking continued as this being became a reptile?

PS: That's correct.

ML: Did the being give you any indication why it revealed itself when it had been looking perfectly blond and normal to you?

PS: No. And in the other subsequent encounters I've had, there's been no shapeshifting involved. He just appears as a reptile.

ML: Is it clear to you that it's always the same one?

PS: My feeling is that it is, yes.

ML: Have you seen more than one?

PS: No, I haven't.

ML: Apart from your physical contact, apparently you have some sort of communication with this being. What's the nature of that communication, generally? Is he revealing secrets of the universe? Telling you he loves you? What does he say to you?

PS: Yes, love is expressed, but basically what I get -- and part of this is from hypnotic regression -- is an apocalyptic scenario that I would have to prepare for.

ML: Are you being shown an apocalyptic future?

PS: Possibly. That's the way I'm interpreting it. There may be something that I will see in my lifetime that I will have to deal with, and I'm being reminded of the amount of spiritual and emotional centeredness I must have to make whatever transition is necessary. Everything I say should be prefaced with, "It seems to me," because I have no answers to any of this stuff yet, and I may not, ever. I know I may have to make a friend of the unknown forever. But I want to make peace with this, because I don't want to live a life of desperation.

ML: Do you see a relationship between the various entities you've met -- grays and reptilians, for example -- or are these different types of entities operating separately?

PS: For me, they are somewhat separate. I think we're talking about many different factions within many different species, coming from the past, present and future as we know time. I think that there could be intelligent, benevolent, spiritually evolved reptilians. I think there could be warrior classes that are still raping and pillaging, like any invading force might do in a foreign land. One thing I want to stress is that it's really dangerous to generalize about any of these entities. I've come to realize [that] the more peace I make with these experiences, the more peaceful they are.

ML: You seem remarkably at ease, considering what you've been through. Is there any final thought you'd like to share with our readers?

PS: One of the most amazing things about this is that it really makes you look at your beliefs. I think that unless we all do that, we don't stand a chance of having the kind of life we're all entitled to -- one that's peaceful, that has a sense of unity and oneness. The truth is never going to be delivered in the package that we want it in. I think people are opening up to this. That's a really positive thing.

 

 

 

 

 

The Sun online posted this:

Pamela Stonebrooke: Encounter ... Pam says she enjoyed sex with an alien

By Louise Compton

FEW people can claim to have experienced "out of this world" sex - but Pamela Stonebrooke is a woman who can. The 52-year-old jazz singer says she enjoyed mind-blowing alien romps with a six-foot reptilian for three years. Her story is among a number featured in World's Strangest UFO Stories which premieres this Sunday on the Discovery Channel. Speaking exclusively to The Sun Online, Pamela revealed: "My first sexual encounter with an alien was unlike any love-making I've experienced before. It was so intense and enjoyable and, without wanting to get too graphic, he was so much larger than most men. "I remember exactly how I felt when I saw him for the first time. I awoke from my sleep to find myself making love to what appeared to be a Greek god. At first I assumed it was an exceptionally lucid dream. But the sex was very intense and as I closed my eyes I was overwhelmed by how comfortable I felt with this unknown being. "The next time I opened my eyes he had transformed into a reptilian entity with scaley, snake-like skin. It was then I realised I was making love to a shape-shifting alien. Sensing I was scared, the reptile whispered, 'We've always been together, we love each other.' The orgasms were intense. When I tell men about my reptilian experience, they find it difficult." Pamela said her first alien bonk took place in 1998, more than a year after her first extra-terrestrial encounter. At the time, she was working as a high-powered celebrity agent in Houston, USA, and says she had no interest in the mysterious world of little green men. She told us: "My first conscious contact was in 1994. At the time I was working long hours so it was just a normal, busy day at the office. That night I went to sleep early and instead of waking up at the normal time and heading off to work, I awoke aboard what seemed to be a space craft. "I found myself huddled in the foetal position in a very dimly lit, metallic room, shaped like a truncated pyramid. ?I looked around nervously and a line of small, grey beings walked into the room looking at me. One of them, I think she was female, approached me and said: 'Don't be afraid, just come with me.' I followed her into another room and she shut the door behind us. As soon as it shut, it disappeared and there were three smaller female aliens looking at me and calling me 'Mummy'. All my fears hit me at once. I was absolutely terrified. Then the next thing I knew I was back in my bed again. It left me feeling incredibly frightened because the experience was so real.

Diva Pamela Stonebrooke

Extra-terrestrial ... first visit was scary

"I got up to splash my face with water and as I did so, I rolled up the sleeves of my kimono and noticed a number of little bruise marks on my arms. When I saw them it brought everything back. And I remembered them grabbing my arms which must have left the marks. I didn't sleep well that night. In fact I didn't sleep well for nearly a year." Fascinated by her experience, Pamela arranged to be regressed via hypnosis to see if she could find out more about what happened to her. She told us: "It was fascinating and it brought back lots of memories which led me to believe I'd had more than one alien encounter. It was amazing because I had always found the extra-terrestrial world pretty ludicrous. But I began to see things differently. I even asked an artist to draw my impressions of the reptilian visitor and started a support group for people who have experienced similar things. It was initially difficult to tell family and friends about, but I overcame the embarrassment factor pretty quickly. I honestly don't care if people laugh at my story because I would have been the same prior to my mind-expanding encounters." PAMELA'S story is among a number featured in World's Strangest UFO Stories which premieres this Sunday on Discovery Channel.-End of the article

Pamela Stonebrooke: “I do not teach people to get out of their bodies to have sex with Reptilians… As for sex on the astral, it is not physically localized.”

Pamela explains her experiences, astral projection and sexual affair with an alien. She stated (Verbatim): “I would simply like to share that astral projection is one of the most powerful tools for the exploration of consciousness that I have found to date, and believe me, I have walked down many paths in the quest for my spirit.

I do not teach people to get out of their bodies to have sex with Reptilians. I have been astral projecting for nearly two decades, and for over a year now I have been able to consciously control and direct my experiences to unravel and confront "many" life issues. We have access to those interdimensional realms and they are within our reach to explore. I believe it is the cutting edge of experiential consciousness exploration. I have met loved ones who have transitioned, gone to past lives, and what I perceive to be future lives. I have seen other entities that I cannot/will not even begin to label, much less, discuss on the internet. These experiences are sacred to me and I'm learning not to offer them up to an onslaught of viciousness and ridicule. I will, however, tell you that in the astral state, I have had healings, and have floated in a sea of knowingness that is beyond thought...overwhelmed with love, acceptance and forgiveness...as close to the "source" as I have ever felt. I must admit that it is my primary target when I consciously get out. This skill is the same as a near death experience but it is controllable, repeatable and not trauma based. Many NDEers have stated, it is life altering. Imagine doing it at will, without it being trauma induced, and controlling your destination. It is a thought responsive realm in which your focused/directed thought/intention will immediately manifest the experience of your choice. My goal is to be "awake" 24 hours a day. Let me further add that I have been able to target/direct my exploration to see my four hybrid daughters. I had suffered much guilt at having rejected them and in that interaction (meeting them on the astral) I was able to tell them how sorry I was and express my love. It was as healing and cathartic as lifetimes of therapy. I have also targeted the Reptilians and I feel that they are a soul group of mine, as are the Greys. I can't go into the many experiences I've had that suggest this to me, but that is my feeling.

As for sex on the astral, it is not physically localized. Nor is it the religiously orchestrated, guilt-ridden, pornographic act that we have relegated the sexual union to...allowing it to be bastardized on this plane of existence. Sex on the astral is a complete merging of energy and spirit...a communion and knowingness that goes beyond so-called rational thought, into a realm of pure being. The astounding experience of the higher astral planes are perceived as somewhat orgasmic only because that is the only way we have of describing that incredibly profoundly ecstatic state of being. We keep trying to ascribe our moral values, attitudes and definitions to other worldly experiences where they simply do not apply.

As John Mack says "You can't get there from here." It would be helpful if we could start looking beyond our dualistic views, judgments and limited perceptions. My feeling is that the entities that we come in contact with are soul groups that we have had incarnations with. It's like an expanded understanding of reincarnation that goes beyond our physical/human lifetimes. Perhaps through the hybridization program we are creating a species that our spirits will one day inhabit? Please understand that these are my impressions and I fully understand that these concepts will be beyond the pale for those who cannot embrace these ideas.

One of the reasons I teach people consciously controlled out of the body is that I'm very aware that you cannot convince anyone that "any" experiences are real, much less, paranormal ones. But, when we are able to have our own personal and experiential validation of the multidimensional beings that we are, we gain an unprecedented and expanded view of the nature of reality. We can switch on that dormant DNA and accelerate our spiritual evolution, often beyond our capacity to articulate it. Homo Noeticus...the next leap in our evolution. We are awesome and creative beings capable of much more than we can ever "fully" know...it's simply a matter of how much "more" you "want" to know. Personally, it is an insatiable passion. Victimization and fear (and certainly "hard" science) will never solve this mystery....but paranormal pioneers might stand a chance of piercing the veil. I believe that to know yourself as an inter/multidimensional being can put you on equal ground with any entity that you come in contact with. I know, from my own experience and several other people, that OOB exploration can be a powerful tool for experiencers in terms of processing these interactions.

An open letter from Pamela Stonebrooke to the members of the UFO community

 I'm writing this in response to the news item that appeared in a recent issue of The New York Post about my forthcoming book, Experiencer: A Jazz Singer's True Account of Extraterrestrial Contact. Since the article unfortunately conveyed the impression that the book would be sensationalistic, it seems appropriate that I share some thoughts with you, and set the record straight about the book I am writing. I know that The New York Post piece seriously misrepresented the true nature of the book. The book is multi-faceted, and treats the abduction phenomenon, in all of its complexity, with the sensitivity, respect and seriousness it deserves, presenting not only my own experiences, but those of other experiencers as well. I'll be examining and exploring my contact experiences in light of their transformative aspects, recognizing that the phenomenon is, and can be, an incredible catalyst for expanded self-awareness. Interaction with extraterrestrial intelligence has many aspects, of course, but the transformational aspect is fundamental to me. The book will tell about my reptilian encounters, a subject that very few women are prepared to go public with or speak openly about. I praise the courage of the few that already have - and endured public ridicule as a result. Reptilians are not a politically correct species in the UFO community, and to admit to having sex with one - much less enjoying it - is beyond the pale as far as the more conservative members of that community are concerned. But I know from my extensive reading and research, and from talking personally to dozens of other women (and men) that I am not unique in reporting this kind of experience. I am the first to admit that this is a vastly complex subject, a kind of hall of mirrors, where dimensional realities are constantly shifting and changing. Certainly, the reptilians use sex to control people in various ways. They have the ability to shape-shift and to control the mind of the experiencer, as well as to give tremendous pleasure through their mental powers. I have wrestled with all of these implications and the various levels of meaning and possibilities represented by my encounter experiences. I will say, however, as I have said before, that I feel a deep respect for the reptilian entity with whom I interacted, and a profound connection with this being. In a past life regression I did recently, I went to a very remote period in earth's history (perhaps hundreds of thousands of years ago), and saw myself as one of a brotherhood of reptilian warriors facing a catastrophic event in which we perished together (it was possibly nuclear in nature, since I saw a red cloud and felt tremendous heat). I believe that on one level, I may be meeting these entities again, perhaps fellow warriors from the past warning us of an impending, self-inflicted doom - or perhaps they are different aspects of myself. I don't really know; I'm just trying to unravel this puzzle like everyone else. Following my initial Art Bell interview, I received hundreds of letters and e-mails, many from people describing similar encounters to mine. I know that there are people out there who are suffering in isolation and silence, thinking they are going crazy. I have been able to give some of these people strength and courage, so that they can move through their fear and come out the other side, empowered and still able to celebrate life as the incredible adventure that it truly is. I know that when I was processing my Grey experiences, if it had not been for people like John Mack, Budd Hopkins, Kim Carlsberg, Whitley Strieber, John Carpenter, and other researchers and experiencers who have been courageous enough to come forward, putting their lives and reputations on the line, I would have stayed in fear a lot longer, cowering in a corner, my self-esteem and identity shattered. Thanks to them and to the wonderful members of my support group, I am still standing, intact and whole.